I’ve come to the conclusion that learning to trust my Father is something I’m going to keep learning until the day I finally go Home. Because it’s a daily lesson. One where the subject and application will change as the years move on, but it’s still always there.
Back before I married my love, I struggled so much with trusting the Lord with His timing and plan. Why wasn’t I married yet, when all I wanted to be was a wife and mama? And despite what others say, God doesn’t always bring your husband the day after you finally decide to lay it all on the altar and trust Him completely with your singleness. For me, it was something I would trust Him with for awhile, and then take it back, often without knowing. And it wasn’t something I had down and mastered when the Lord brought my husband and I together. Which is why it’s so obvious to me that Aaron is such a gift.
And I’ve found that being married has stretched me even further in learning to trust my Father. Now, my heart and life is intertwined so completely with this other person…so what if something happens to him? And the Lord gave us our babies…so my heart is linked with two more. And if they’re ever taken away, I know a part of me will go too and I’ll be laid bare and vulnerable. Oh, to love is indeed to be vulnerable. And the knowledge of the possibility of such hurt can cripple you. Which is why I’ve found it’s even more important to daily, every moment, trust my Father.
For He holds us all in His hands.
STOP (written in a bit longer than five minutes…I had to get it all out!)